


Comfort

by ifijustsayhello



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Consensual, Consensual Sex, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dreams, Dreams and Nightmares, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Time, Fluff, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hand Jobs, Large Cock, Loss of Virginity, Naked Cuddling, Oral Sex, Passion, Post-Coital Cuddling, Sleepy Cuddles, Smut, Tender Sex, Tenderness, Undressing, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Virginity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-05-22
Packaged: 2019-03-08 12:53:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13458678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifijustsayhello/pseuds/ifijustsayhello
Summary: Post-TLJ Kylo and Rey's force bond reactivates whenever one of them has a nightmare so the other can comfort them. This will start out pretty angsty/fluffy and hopefully eventually lead to some smut.





	1. Little Ben Solo

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try out a multi-chapter fic with these two so here we are. I'm not sure how long it's going to be because I'm not a planner and I just let my writing take me wherever it wants to. Hope people like it!

Kylo stomps into his quarters, too tired to scowl. He sits down on his bed and hunches over to stare at the wall. His days have been endless. And so cold. All he does is bark orders but his throat feels tight and coiled as though he hasn’t spoken to anyone in days. He may as well sit in silence for as much as Hux listens to him. Kylo rubs his temples and falls onto his bed. He climbs under his sheets and clears his mind, letting sleep overcome the constant battle that wages inside his conscious self.

 

A young woman with hair braided in a crown lies in the grass. Her smile is soft and enchanting and he reaches out a small pair of child’s hands to feel it. A giggle bubbles from his chest as she pretends to bite his fingers. She scoops him up in her arms and snuggles her squirming son into her chest, pretending to take large bites out of him. He squeals in delight.

Little Ben Solo feigns protest, “Momma!”

Leia halts her attack. “What, Ben?”

They stare at each other in mock seriousness. He is the first to break. He kisses her cheek and breaks out of her arms to run across the field. She jumps up and chases after him, cream dress fluttering behind her. She lets her son keep his distance.

“Slow down, Ben!” Leia calls out in mock concern.

His name echoes from her lips, “Ben, Ben, Ben.” The mocking tone turns serious as his name surrounds them until it becomes a scream. It’s no longer his mother’s voice screaming. Her form vanishes and Ben Solo turns around. A woman lies on her side, head shaking and hands clenching and releasing the grass in an endless cycle. Her form is familiar but he can’t see her face. He works his way towards her, all the while her whimpers pierce the calm sunshine surrounding them. One of her arms covers her face. He reaches out a hand, finding it to be fully grown again. Ben’s hand touches hers and the dream evaporates.

 

Kylo Ren opens his eyes. Rey’s arm is thrown across her face so that he can only make out the harsh frown on her lips. His hand rests on top of hers. His heart accelerates. He looks around. This is not the bed he fell asleep in. The room is dark but he can make out the outline of her staff leaning against the wall and a table next to the bed with a stack of books. He’s laying on top of the rough blanket that’s fallen down to her hips. She’s on her back, her chest rising and falling sharply with each frantic breath.

She mumbles something but he can only make out the words “why” and “Ben”. His cheeks redden and he withdraws his hand. She rolls onto her side towards him, arm falling to rest on her hard bed. Something tightens in his chest as her eyelids are revealed to him. Rey looks so angry and broken and yet somehow so soft and innocent. Her hand clenches into a fist against the bed and her eyebrows knit together.

This time he can make out her whole sentence. “You said I wasn’t alone.”

He knows that she’s asleep and that she can’t actually hear him but Kylo can’t stop himself from responding.

“You’re not.” He looks her over again, taking in her pain. “I’m right here.”

He reaches out towards her hand again. His eyes are glued to hers, panic shooting cold down to his toes. If she wakes up would she be angry to see him? Would she hit him? Or would she be happy? Would she hold him?

Rey huffs in her sleep, still plagued by unseen nightmares.

Kylo decides it doesn’t matter how mad she gets, he can’t watch her suffer like this. He grabs her small warm hand. Her eyes soften and her lips relax. She exhales and he feels the tension dissipate. He pulls her hand in, cradling it to his chest. A faint smile emerges from her lips. He smiles in return, soft and genuine in the knowledge that no one will see it.

He takes in the sight of a peaceful Rey. Her hair is completely loose, a sight he didn’t know he’d been craving until this moment. She has a simple tunic on that’s bunched up from her bottom hip, exposing a sliver of skin. He averts his eyes once he notices the top of her underwear is exposed. It seems that she is not wearing pants and the only thing covering her bottom half is that very thin blanket. Kylo stiffens.

Rey scoots forward in her sleep, snuggling into the warmth in front of her. Kylo remains still, unsure of what to do with all this contact. She’s definitely going to kill him when she wakes up but he can’t bring himself to pull away. Instead, he melts into her, curving his massive body around her more compact form. He weaves a leg in between hers, his foot resting next to hers. She kicks her leg over his hip in response, blanket slipping aside. His eyes widen at the sight of her exposed thigh. Her skin is pale and her thighs are large for her size, all muscle. His eyes slide quickly past her underwear.

She nuzzles her head against his chest and he presses his nose against the top of her head, breathing in the calming earthy scent of her hair.

It isn’t long before he drifts back into his dream.

 

This time his mother is not waiting for him in the field. Instead, the peaceful Rey calls out to him, words light with laughter. Her hair is down and flutters in the wind with her loose arm wraps. She’s wearing the same dress his mother had been. He is drawn to her in his dream just as much as he was in consciousness.

Kylo runs to her, picking her up and spinning her around. His smile is so big it burns his cheeks. Rey giggles in his arms as the pair tumble to the grass, rolling over each other. He finds himself in a familiar set of pale robes. He used to wear these. Back when his name was-

“Ben!” Rey exclaims, grabbing his face with both of her hands. She pulls his nose to hers and laughs at the intimacy.

He inhales deeply. The sound of his birth name on her lips makes every inch of his body warm.

He closes his eyes as she runs her hands through his thick hair. A tear rolls down his cheek and lands on Rey’s. Her smile fades. She pulls his head against her chest, cradling a young adult Ben Solo in her arms. His powerful sobs shake both of them.

The dream fades into black; Kylo screaming into the nothingness.

“Rey!”

He knows she’s alone now, and scared.

“I won’t leave you, Rey!”

But Ben reaches out his hand for someone who is lightyears away as Kylo Ren sits up in bed, covered in sweat.

He whispers into the cold empty darkness of his quarters, “Rey.”


	2. Words Previously Spoken

Rey doesn’t know what chased her nightmares away but she’s glad that after weeks of watching all her friends die over and over again she can finally sleep through the night. She would never admit this but most of all she’s glad that now when she sees Ben Solo in her dreams he is safe. He seems sad and lost but she can hold him rather than watch him consumed by the fires of his own destruction. She does her best to forget the old nightmare where he thanks her as she thrusts his own lightsaber into his gut, kissing her cheek before crumpling to the snow.

Rey shakes her head to clear it of the image and wraps her gray blanket around her aching shoulders. She closes her eyes and pictures an island.

 

Rey watches waves churn from the safe distance of her cliff. Her gray robes snap with the wind’s pull. She turns around to take in the agressively bright green of the grass. Sleeping forms litter the ground. She weaves her way through the crowd, categorizing familiar faces.

Luke stands at the other end of the field. He looks just as annoyed and unimpressed as she remembers.

“You can feel them. Even in your sleep you can know they are safe.” She smiles. He frowns. “You have more power than you know, Rey. More power than can be controlled.”

“I don’t need to be controlled! I can handle myself.” But her anger is wasted on mist. Luke is gone just as abruptly as he’d appeared. Rey’s head swivels and her eyes land on Finn.

He lays peacefully in her peripherals, shoulders rising and falling gently with his every breath. Snow melts over the burning of a fresh gash through his jacket. She recognizes this forest. She hasn’t seen it in weeks but it will always be with her.

Rey turns, screaming at her enemy. Ben is calm. Flecks of snow swirl around his dark form, some resting in his locks. His eyes are those of a caged animal watching its visitors pass freely by. Her eyebrows furrow as she charges the man. Her feet sink into the ground and she’s running through sand.

The familiar planes of Jakku rise and fall around her. Her legs burn as she pushes towards the man in front of her. Ben watches her struggle, his soft brown robes rustling in the desert air around them. His eyes are wide with fear of this woman charging him. He throws a hand out towards her; his open palm both a warning and an invitation. Rey’s feet lose their fire and she slows. She closes the final space between them with two measured steps.

Her eyes watch his for any sign of a trick; as always she finds none. Rey extends her hand, pressing her palm against his. The pair inhale as one. The wind ceases. The sand and dust settle. Rey watches Ben Solo’s eyes darken with torment as the man before her ages. Kylo Ren looks back at her, unafraid. He curls his fingers, intertwining them with hers. He yanks her hand towards himself so harshly that she has to throw her free hand onto his chest to keep from falling over. She looks up into his large eyes, finding them pleading and dark.

“Say it.”

Rey’s eyebrows scrunch together in her indignant confusion.

“You can’t trick me anymore!”

She tries to push away from his chest but he grabs her hand and hunches over, his face crowding her entire view.

“Please.” The word barely escapes his throat. She can feel it catch in her own.

Rey chokes on the word. Ben’s grip loosens as the distance between them stretches. She claws at her throat, unable to pull any oxygen.

 

Rey sits up, gasping for air. An arm slides down her torso, its fingers brushing her hip.

Rey turns, chest heaving to find a man lying beside her. Her scream gets caught somewhere on the way out of her throat as her eyes process the vulnerability of a sleeping Ben.

His hair is disheveled, twisting around his calm face. Rey could almost pretend he’s smiling and something inside her crumbles. Her hand extends before she knows what’s happening. She pushes back his hair so that it can’t cover his soft eyelids. She finds her hands exploring the texture of his luxurious hair. Her own eyelids grow heavy.

Rey slides down onto her back, settling into the bed. He grumbles at the movement. His hand tightens on her hip and pulls her closer to his expansive form. Her neck tenses. This is the same man that would not hesitate to destroy everyone she knows. But there’s something about his fingertips against her skin.

She’s burning in the most pleasant way.

A memory echoes through her brain. “You’re not alone.” She remembers the words but feels them touch her ears now in the silence of a dark bedroom. He’s whispering it to her; screaming it at her; spelling the words on her skin with his fingertips.

She raises a hand experimentally to run along his exposed arm, the expanse of his muscles flying past her fingers. Air shoots into her lungs at the sight of a soft, easy smile on his tortured lips.

“Rey…” He whispers with so much desperation that her cheeks redden. She checks his eyes to make sure that he hasn’t woken up.

She continues her hand’s journey over his shoulder and up his neck to rest on his cheek. Rey brings her face right up to his, lining her lips up. She pauses, watching his mouth soften in his sleep. He can sense the electric energy between the miniscule distance separating their lips. There is something unknowable that binds their thoughts and emotions together and it frightens her. Rey raises her chin, pressing a firm kiss to his forehead. Ben melts into her, pulling their torsos together.

She exhales and runs her fingers through his hair, drifting back into sleep. Future Rey can worry about the consequences of finding the Supreme Leader of the First Order in her bed.

She falls back into an easy sleep. Her dreams ebb and flow around images of her and Ben. He holds her in a steady ocean, teaching her to float. They laugh into each other, bellies burning and foreheads meeting to find some stability in one another. She holds his hand as they approach her friends. She finds herself in the middle of a giant hug; her friends surround the pair. They sit atop an AT-AT surrounded by sand, his weight pressed against her as she points to the familiar stars. Every vision ends the same: his large brown eyes meet her soft hazel ones.

In their sleep Ben and Rey cling to one another. Her hand grips his loose sleep tunic and his hand curls possessively over her hip. Eventually a harsh sliver of sunlight slices through their bodies and he fades back into the blackness of his own bedroom. Rey shivers and pulls her blanket around her shoulders. She does not sleep for much longer.


	3. Learning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben has grown accustomed to finding Rey in his bed after a nightmare. So when he dreams of Kylo Ren confronting him in a forest, he is not surprised to wake up to the sight of her. He decides to enter her dream through their bond and finds himself teaching her to swim. He also discovers that he's not the only one that's grown fond of their connection.

Not much has changed for the Supreme Leader. And yet, everything has changed. He continues on with his meetings but now when Hux undermines him Kylo doesn’t feel the need to force choke the infuriating ginger. Instead, he’s started envisioning a pair of intense hazel eyes and all his anger fades.

Today he’s able to actually process the fact that General Hux believes they have found the system on which the last breath of the resistance awaits.

“Prepare my ship,” Kylo commands. “I will find the rebels myself.”

“Very well. How many troops shall I dispatch?”

“None.” Hux opens his obscene mouth but the Supreme Leader speaks again before he can be offended, “I do not need” he leans over the man wilting before him, “ _assistance_ to crush the last of the resistance.”

Hux swallows and steps back, fearing and resenting his superior’s anger. “Very well.”

The two look each other over. Every other being in the room is still. They’ve seen plenty of these stand-offs and know exactly how bad they usually end.

“Good.” Kylo turns with a flourish of his cape and exits the bridge. The crew members exhale as one. Hux’s cheeks flush and he shouts at them to get back to work.

 

Kylo slides his quarter’s doors open and unclips his saber from his belt. He turns the weapon’s gigantic hilt over easily in enormous hands. He removes his gloves one at a time and re-encases the saber with them so that he can properly feel the thrum of his kyber crystal. He’s grown so used to its power that he rarely focuses on its pull anymore. The metal tube encasing it feels so frail and he knows with a simple flick of a finger he could shatter it and release the chaotic cracked power of his crystal.

But he won’t.

He throws the weapon across his quarters. The metal clangs against cold steel walls and skids across the slick floor. He watches it spin, finally coming to a rest pointed directly back at its owner.

He leaves it on the empty ground, finding comfort in his heavy sheets. Red consumes his eyelids as consciousness slips away.

 

Kylo sits up, eyes meeting a looming Rey’s. She stands above him, saber humming against his left ear. Red filters his view from her raging blade. Her eyes are almost heartless. He keeps eye contact as he crouches forward onto his knees. She moves the saber accordingly, apparently unwilling to cut him again. He rises to his feet, overcoming her in his full height. She seems unmoved. Far from shrinking away, her energy magnifies. Her anger reaches out in furious tendrils to grasp at his form. A tense breath escapes his chest.

“I won’t fight you again.”

“Why not?” She demands.

He caresses her cheek with a bare hand. “I can’t”

She scoffs at his answer but his expression does not break. She places a hand over his larger one cradling her cheek. Her eyes shift for a moment as desire shoots through her bloodstream, strong and insistent.

Rey lets out a shocked cry and slouches forward. Blue light casts harsh shadows up her pained face. Her hands claw at a dark hole beneath her breast before they fall limply to her side. He catches her as her eyes glaze over.

Tears stream down Ben’s face. He falls back to the ground, cradling the woman in his arms in their joint descent. He buries his face into her hair.

A mechanically altered deep voice chastises him. It is too familiar. “Your compassion for the girl is your greatest weakness.” The man before him feels both centuries old and freshly birthed unto the universe. “We destroy what makes us weak.”

Ben lifts his head to see a familiar mask. He used to wear it once upon a time.

“Kill the past.” His natural voice and his modified version harmonize in the dead air of the snow swirling around. He screams and tries to tighten his grip on Rey but her body dissolves in his arms.

 

Ben opens his eyes to blackness, drenched in sweat. He squeezes the hand in his own. He concentrates on breathing for a minute. Rey lies peacefully next to him, one hand sandwiched between her thighs and the other between his enormous set of hands. They’ve been visiting each other like this for months now. He almost looks forwards to the nightmares because he knows they mean he’ll see her again.

His chest slows as his breathing calms. He feels too damp to relax though. Ben looks over at the woman lying next to him. He releases her hand and sits up. Her hand fists his black sheets and her brows furrow. She mutters something, annoyed.

He wants desperately to remove his soaked shirt. The cloth sticks to his skin uncomfortably. It feels wrong to expose himself to an unconscious woman though. Then again, it’s nothing she’s never seen-or felt before. Ben has no control over the force bond so they’ve connected on nights where he had already opted out of a shirt before. Has the frequency of him sleeping topless increased since he started getting a nighttime visitor? Maybe. Has he made sure to always wear pants? Definitely.

It would be different though for him to intentionally take his shirt off with her lying peacefully next to him. What if she wakes up right as he takes it off? Rey would accuse him of abducting and...seducing her. But she never wakes up. And he knows that she likes the feel of his chest.

On those times when they connect while he’s exposed she always runs her hands over his torso like she’s trying to memorize every muscle. In fact, most nights that he’s covered her hands find their way underneath his shirt anyways to explore his skin. So it really shouldn’t matter if Ben takes off the stifling fabric, or so he tells himself.

He grabs the hem of his black tank and yanks it over his head, chucking it over the foot of his bed. He instantly feels better as cool air flows over his glistening chest. He pushes the sweaty hair back from his forehead before laying back down on his side, face to face with the most beautiful person in the galaxy. Ben knows he’s not supposed to think of his greatest adversary in this way but it isn’t his fault. She shouldn’t smile that way or run her assured hands over his body or fill his dreams with visions of a future side by side.

His hand rests in the steep valley of her waist. Her wide smile answers his touch. He pulls her in closer, no longer caring about his mission to cool down. She presses a delicate hand against one of his pecs, her smile twisting to be less innocent. He breathes in sharply and very slowly scrunches the fabric in his hand to expose her side. He slides his finger tips one at a time over her excruciatingly smooth skin. She hums slightly at his touch.

Ben is mesmerized by how responsive she is. His eyes slide over her lips, slightly parted and curved upwards. He gently grips her waist. He swallows before rolling onto his back, pulling her with him.

Rey settles into him to take up the full expanse of his chest, her ear pressing against his heart. One of her hands grips his shoulder while the other splays across his pec next to her head. He smirks to himself and tangles a hand into her wild hair. He combs his fingers through her hair and presses his free hand into her lower back.

She looks so content that Ben wonders what she could possibly be dreaming of. He shuts his eyes and reaches out for her with their bond. Her light sucks him in and he’s back under just like that.

 

Light filters through thick trees to create speckles of sunshine on her freckled skin. Ben is mesmerised once again by the sight of Rey. Her eyes are closed and her hair swirls around her in the water, tickling his arm. Her weight rests gently in his hands, trusting him to keep her afloat. He finds himself standing in waist-deep water. Her chest and pelvis are wrapped in fabric but that leaves the rest of her body exposed to him. He feels briefly guilty for the way his eyes frantically memorize every dip and rise of her flesh before he remembers that this is her dream. She put herself in his arms and chose (albeit subconsciously) to be so exposed. She also apparently decided that he did not need to cover up either.

Ben chuckles to himself as he realizes that he’s not only shirtless in her dream but wearing some very short compression underwear.

Her eyes fly open. “What’s so funny?”

He tenses for the anger, half expecting her to call him a monster again now that their eyes have met. But her eyes remain soft. As the seconds stretch on their gaze becomes more intense.

Ben breaks the silence, “Nothing.”

Rey throws out an arm to steady it on his. “Can you show me again? I think I’m ready to try.”

His eyes dart down her body again and he swallows, unsure of what she’s asking. “Uh…”

She blinks at him. “Swimming? You said you could teach me that part? Or am I just supposed to float in your arms for the rest of my life?”

That doesn’t sound like such a terrible idea to him. However he jumps at the chance to teach Rey something, anything. Even if it’s only in a dream. Perhaps this will make her more susceptible to him in consciousness. If he can ever find her.

“So can you let me down?” She glances pointedly at the arm supporting her low back.

“Ah! Yes.” He leans forward and begins to drop his arm so her feet can float to the pond’s floor, raising her up with his arm around her shoulders. She wraps her arms around his shoulders in turn, using his body to lift herself upright. Her feet find solid ground but her arms linger. Their eyes find each other again but this time they are much closer. His eyes dart to her pink lips as she raises herself up on her toes. His lips part slightly and his eyelids become heavy.

But this is just a dream. He doesn’t want the first time they kiss to be imagined. He wants their first kiss to be real and in the flesh. He’s not sure when he decided he wanted a first kiss but the desire does not feel sudden.

Ben drops his arms from her and takes a step back. Rey frowns.

“Watch me and then I’ll help you try.”

She crosses her arms and clamps her mouth shut. He sinks into the water and performs slow, deliberate strokes to the edge of the pond and back. He glides back to her side and rises to his feet again, water dripping from his long hair and sliding down his toned body. She is completely zoned out.

“Rey?” he waves to her, trying to attract her eyes away from his chest.

“Hm?” Her head pops up as she comes back to herself. “Oh, yeah. Okay. I’m ready to try.”

She sinks down in the water, only her head remaining above the surface. She seems unsure of the next step though and looks at Ben expectantly. He squats down too.

“I’ll support you so you’re floating on your stomach this time. Then we’ll add in the arms and legs.” His hands find her waist.

“Okay.”

Rey kicks off of the pond floor, lifting her hips so he can brace them with an arm. He places his other right below her collarbone so that he’s supporting her. It does not miss him how excruciatingly close his arm is to her breasts.

“The leg part is easy. You just have to kick. We both know you’re good at that.”

She turns to look at him, suppressing a laugh. “Was that a joke?”

He shrugs. “Am I not allowed to make jokes?”

“I didn’t know that you could.” She grins wickedly at him.

“You know what?” Ben drops his arms so that she falls below the surface but immediately returns them and raises her up.

She spit out water and pushes her hair out of her face. “That was mean!”

“So was kicking me to the ground and giving me a scar!”

Her smile fades. “I didn’t-”

He went too far. He always does that. “I know. Let’s just focus.” She turns her head back to the water. “Okay so as for the arms just do what I did. Scoop the water down and away from you. If you do that and kick you should be fine. Are you ready to try?”

Rey takes a deep breath. “I’m ready.”

“Start slow. I’ll walk with you.”

She takes a couple of gentle strokes, working out the mechanics of the motion.

“You can tilt your shoulders with your strokes so that your head pops up for air.”

Rey tries to twist with her stroke but just flails in place. The motion brushes her boobs right over his arm and Ben panics. He retracts his arms and jumps to his feet.

At the loss of his arms, Rey sinks below the surface. She thrashes below the water, trying to fight to the surface. However, it sinks further and further away as they suddenly find themselves in a seemingly bottomless ocean. Ben dives below the surface.

She’s already sunk so far. He propels himself towards her. When he reaches her the terror leaves her eyes. She no longer needs oxygen. He finds that neither does he. Their bodies drift in front of one another as their hair mingles together and dances around in the pull of tide. Her eyes are bright beneath the surface. His hands cradle her face. Adrenaline rushes his system as he decides he doesn’t care about waiting. Her eyes shut as their lips find each other’s. The kiss is feather light underwater and he can really feel the delicate press of her perfect lips against his. He becomes lost in the kiss, not noticing that the water has completely vanished.

 

Her face is warm beneath his hands. He lets one slide down Rey’s back, pressing her body closer to his. He finds a thin fabric now separates her skin from his touch.

He breaks the kiss to look at her, finding her eyes staring right back at his in the darkness of his room. She’s really in his arms, awake and in his arms and looking at him as though they’re still underwater.

“This isn’t a dream.” She whispers, a tear running down her cheek.

“No.” Ben wipes the tear away with his thumb. He readies himself for her to push him away, for her to accuse him of kissing her against her will, for her to slap him.

“Good.” Her voice is louder, more sure.

Rey leans back in to reconnect their lips. This time there is so much weight to their kiss that he decides second kisses are much better. She leans into him, pressing him down onto his back. Third kisses are even better. The kisses splinter into too many to keep track of. Just when he feels like he’s getting the hang of it, Ben rolls them over to put Rey on her back.

She doesn’t make it there. Instead, he finds himself hovering over his bed, staring intently

into black sheets. He groans and drops himself onto the mattress, burying his face into it to mask his frustration.

Rey finds herself staring up at her quarter’s ceiling instead of Ben Solo’s dreamy eyes. The reality of what just happened hits her. She sits up in bed.

“Now you’ve done it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we're getting somewhere! Also, the chapters seem to be getting progressively longer so that's cool I guess.


	4. The Space Between

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey comes to terms with her feelings for a certain someone (with his help of course.) Special appearances from Finn, Poe, and Leia. Things get steamy!

Rey watches Poe and an officer argue over a holo of some far off system. They’ve all been sitting in this room for hours, trying to strategize. Leia rarely speaks. The other commanding officers have grown weary. Poe shouts and one jolts forward in his seat, clearly waking himself up. The officer yelling back at Poe jabs a finger at his chest and he doesn’t break eye contact as he grabs it. Finn jumps up and gently pushes Poe back.

Rey doesn’t hear his placating as her eyes shift to her hands in her lap. They seem so small. They weren’t always but ever since the first time she touched Kylo’s expansive hand she’s found her own to seem tiny. She studies the creases of her hands folded together and envisions that large pair of hands encasing them. She remembers the very real pressure of those same hands desperately gripping her waist.

It’s been hard for her to focus the past couple days.

She wants desperately to surrender to the call of the bond. She’s been blocking the pull for so long that she’s afraid to let go. Still, everytime she looks up or turns around a small part of her expects to see his welcoming dark eyes. She wants to see him again, and not just in dreams or when he’s sleeping. She needs to talk to him. Everything has changed. Their kiss still lingers on her lips all these days later.

She’s begun allowing her hands to wander further whenever she wakes to his sleeping form pressed against hers. She’s not sure where her dreams end anymore. She feels his hands worshipping and exploring her but when she opens her eyes his subconscious self is just as grabby. 

“Rey.”

Her jaw clenches. She knows that voice. Its depth vibrates through her very being. She looks up and there he is, Ben Solo, standing on the other side of the table. His face is soft and open. She stares him down. She’s filled with rage that he’s done this to her; that he’s turned her into some foolish girl who invites her enemy into a strategy meeting through their stupid force bond.

“We need to talk.” His voice is pleading.

Rey pushes up from the table, not breaking eye contact. Every head turns to her.

“Where are you going?” Poe seems somehow offended that she has no intention of watching the bickering anymore. She doesn’t know anything about strategy anyways. She’s no help in these meetings. They think that she’ll somehow be able to give some Jedi insight but she isn’t even a Jedi. She’s just a girl from Jakku. She can fight and move some rocks but she’s far from enlightened or anything. She just needs someone to point her in the right direction and she’ll destroy anyone standing in her way.

Ben shifts his weight uncomfortably.

Leia studies Rey’s face as the latter struggles to come up with an appropriate answer.

“Let the woman meditate, Dameron. Jedi love meditation. They can only handle so much discourse.” Leia waves her hand at the sullen group surrounding her. “Besides, she’s not missing much.”

Ben’s eyes snap to the side, trying to locate the source of the voice. “Is that…?”

Rey barely allows herself a small nod for him. He swallows and turns back to her, missing the slight sweep of his mother’s eyes as she detects something; a shift in the energy around her that she cannot quite place.

Poe frowns at Leia before turning to Rey. “I’ll debrief you later then.”

Rey nods to him, not missing the concerned look on Finn beside him. She gives Leia a small, unconvincing smile before turning to leave.

“I’ll just be...meditating then.”

Leia smirks.

Rey does her best not to run from the room.

Ben calls after her, “Rey, wait!”

He runs down black hallways trying to find her but she’s gone, lost in the bond.

 

Rey spends the rest of the afternoon meditating in an attempt to clear her mind of thoughts of him; of how clean his hair had looked, how bright his eyes had been, and even the fact that he had been gloveless.

He was right of course, they did need to talk. But she knows exactly how that conversation will end and she’d rather not have to walk away from him a second time. She isn’t sure that she has the strength.

No matter how much she distracts herself in consciousness, Rey is powerless to control her dreams. She knows that he’ll be waiting for her there. She succumbs to the welcoming arms of sleep, preparing herself for the nightmares of him on his knees before her.

 

His arms encase her. His firm body guides her; spinning her around. Her cheeks are flushed. Her pulse races. Her lips hum as his fingertips skim across her shoulders, her biceps, her wrists.

Rey’s eyes meet Ben Solo’s and all the anger, hatred, frustration, desperation, fear, admiration, confusion, and infatuation fades. Only a man’s eyes and a woman’s eyes exist. He dips her, using the opportunity to bend down and graze her neck with his lips.

Fire.

Everywhere.

Her neck, her chest, her hands.

His hands, his chest, his cheeks.

Her face, her heart, her thighs.

His lips, his heart, his core. 

Their eyes meet once again and they sway as one, breathe as one, think as one.

Who is to say whose hands brush against whose soft neck? Whose lips find relief from whose jaw? Whose solid arms supports whose crumbling torso?

They both lean their heads towards each other, lips reaching into the space separating the pair. They are an inch apart, breathing each other in.

 

Rey feels her very center cry out in agony as the dream shifts.

 

BB-8 rolls past her, screeching something about tie fighters. She looks down to see a pilot’s orange and white suit on her body.

“Get to your X-wings!” Poe Dameron shouts at Rey and the other pilots rushing around her. He has blood running down his sharp cheekbone.

“Poe?”

BB-8 nudges her calf and Rey exchanges a look with the droid. Poe jumps into his own ship.

The droid beeps at the woman, “Looks like it’s just you and me!”

Rey’s mouth falls open.

BB-8 bumps into her leg again. “Poe said it’s time to go!”

Her brain restarts. “Right!”

Rey sprints across the expansive hangar and jumps into an empty cockpit. She picks up the helmet waiting for her. She runs shaking hands over the lines, memorizing the feel beneath her dry fingertips. She had a helmet once before…that one had her name on it too. But this time it’s because of her that the helmet has that name on it instead of the other way around.

She launches her ship into the stars. Her friend’s x-wings twist and dance around her, lighting up the blackness of space with their blasts. Rey’s stomach lurches as her ship spins past a pair of tie fighters.

BB-8 beeps from the back of her X-wing, “Show these Hutt spawn what you got!”

Rey smiles and pulls back on the controls, dropping them back from the pursuit. She laughs in an insane burst of confidence. Her panic evaporates and a familiar giddy lightness overtakes her gut. Her shoulders relax as she feels the ship curve and careen rather than forcing its movements. She shoots down the tie fighters that had been pursuing her and frees her friends from the ones on their tails.

She laughs at the ease with which she takes out the First Order pilots.

Someone screams. Her laugh vanishes as the sound cuts through her body. It’s not coming from her lips, or from her droid, or even from the comm in her helmet.

“REY!”

“I’m right here! Why are you screaming? I’m right here! What’s wrong?!”

A familiar pair of large brown eyes meet hers, kicking Rey out of her dream.

 

Her eyes fly open, heart pounding against her rib cage. She takes in the sight of the face that belongs to those eyes. His scar seems brighter, angrier than she remembers. Ben looks more devastated than when she had turned down his offer to rule the galaxy together. She reaches out her hand, just as before. This time though, Rey brushes her fingertips against that scar she gave him.

As her skin meets his, Ben exhales. A smile tugs at the corners of his lips when her hand extends past the scar and into his loose hair. He tilts his head up with the slightest tug from her grip. Rey looks down at him, a grin twisting her own lips.

She jerks her hand away from his scalp when she notices the incriminating expanse of his bare chest. Rey rolls onto her back, creating some space between the pair. She only has time for half a breath before his body follows.

Ben rolls on top of her, pinning her into her soft mattress with his expansive form. Her cheeks burn at the not completely unfamiliar sight of his bare back laid across her chest. Her hands hover, unsure of where to rest them. His head nuzzles against her, finding comfort in her breast. She exhales at the warm sensation of being needed. Her hands relax, one resting on a shoulder blade and the other on his mid back. Ben’s back is so massive that she can barely cover his shoulder blade. His chest expands against hers. One of his hands drags across her arm. She traces the line of his muscular arm to find that hand and guide it to her neck.

His head lifts from her chest delicately. He turns his head and their eyes meet.

Her eyes widen. He’s never woken up before.

Sleep fades from his hooded eyes as they expand at the sight of her blown pupils. Kylo doesn’t waste time questioning how he got in her arms or what could have possibly caused her to look at him like that. He presses his free hand into the mattress next to her head so that he can bring his face above hers. They study each other, noses about to touch.

“Don’t leave this time.” Rey’s voice is sultry, surprising herself.

Kylo swallows. He shifts his weight and gasps as his aching groin finds some contact. She tilts her pelvis in response, giving him only a taste of what his body asks for.

“I would sooner die.”

“You don’t have to be so dramatic.” Her laugh is short.

He slides his nose against hers, hovering his lips above hers.

When he speaks his lips brush against hers. “I’m just being honest.”

He withdraws and maintains the gap between their craving mouths as long as he can bear it. She breathes him in but quickly loses her patience.

Rey pushes forward and finally feels the curve of his plump lips on her own. She pulls back in an attempt to check his expression but his lips follow hers, pressing her into the pillow. They get lost in each other’s mouths, tongues eagerly exploring enticing new territory. The two finally pull apart and his lips hungrily trace a line across her jaw and down her neck. Now that he’s started kissing her he has no intention of stopping.

Rey calms her breathing. “This isn’t how I pictured this going.”

His lips leave her neck with a thick pop as he brings his eyes back to hers. His dark eyes are wild.

“You’ve pictured it?”

She licks her lips. “No! I just meant that-”

Her eyes widen at the intensity in his dark eyes.

“I have. I’ve pictured you,” his eyes flit to her chest heaving between them, “just like this.”

He gasps as she hooks a leg around his hips and pulls his abdomen flush against her own.

He rolls his hips, giving her the friction she wordlessly asks for. Rey inhales sharply, clenching her jaw shut. He nudges his nose against her neck, breathing in the harsh fragrance of her adrenaline. A whimper escapes her closed mouth.

“Say it.”

Her mouth pops open and he grinds a gasp out of her.

“What?”

“Tell me…” he pants as his cock stiffens. “Tell me what you want.” She presses a hungry kiss to his jaw, teeth pulling on the tight skin. He groans. “Tell me how you feel.” His eyes snap down to hers, begging her to answer. His hips slow at the unfiltered affection in her eyes.

“I…” Rey’s eyes flit to his expectant lips. “I want-no it doesn’t matter.” His eyes watch hers as she slides both her hands onto either side of his face. “You know.”

“Yes I do, Rey. But I need to hear you say it before we go any further.” His voice is thick in desperation.

Rey can’t help but oblige. “I love you.”

Tears rim his eyes.

“Who do you love? Which man?”

A tear falls down her own cheek.

“Ben…” she feels just as lost as she had in the throne room.

He grabs one of her hands from his cheek and presses it to his racing chest.

“He’s gone! Can you feel him? No! Ben is dead!” He drops his hand and turns his head away but hers doesn’t follow.

Rey’s hand presses against his firm chest. “No he isn’t. You’re Ben, you’re Kylo Ren, you’re the supreme leader, I don’t care! Whatever name you want, you’re mine!” Rey sits up, pressing their lips back together.

Kylo’s lips answer in earnest.

This complete acceptance is a new feeling to him. Usually people pick and choose the parts of him that they want. No one has ever offered to take the whole. He’s wanted all of her, every inch, every thought, every doubt since he first saw her. He never dreamt that she would want the same of him.

“Every inch, every thought, every doubt.” Rey’s eyes dig into his, chest racing. “All of you.”

Guided by a sudden lightness in his chest, Ben’s lips find hers again. He presses his body against hers, guiding her back down to the mattress. Their heads weave and twist in tandem, cresting and falling like waves. Ben forgets Kylo and thinks only of Rey: soft, warm, and eager beneath him.

Something shifts inside of her. Rey slides her hands beneath his shirt, seeking something solid as her brain begins to feel light. There’s a warmth and a yearning developing between her legs. It’s a feeling she’s known but never pursued before. She’s not sure of all the details of what she’s about to do but she’s ready to find out. Fingers trembling, she dips them into his pants.

Ben’s kisses find a renewed sense of eagerness as her hand explores his most sensitive region. Her fingers flutter around his length, taking in its full size. She wraps her hand around his cock just as his tongue presses into her mouth. She begins slowly moving her hand up and down, finding a rythm. He hums, delightfully baffled that Rey is actually touching his dick. She begins pumping in earnest, feeling confident that she’s figured out the motion.

He moves his mouth to her neck, needing something he can sink his teeth into. No one else’s hands have ever touched him there and it’s turned out to be the sweetest sensation. His mouth works overtime and he briefly wonders if any marks he gives her will last after the bond. Rey switches up her grip, jolting him with an overwhelming sense of pleasure. His mouth releases of its own accord. Ben refocuses and attacks the other side of her neck. Her deft hands feel so amazing that he has to make her feel just as good somehow.

He slides his right hand down the rough texture of her sleep shirt. When his fingers find what they’re looking for they push under the waistband of her pants. Rey gasps in response and presses a sloppy kiss into his cheek. She presses impatient kisses along the planes of his face but he is too preoccupied with feeling his way between her legs. His fingers slide through the small patch of hair and slowly press over the edge, finding her lips. His eyes widen at the slippery smoothness of the delicate skin awaiting his fingers. He runs a single finger along the length of her slit.

“Ben.” Her desperate whisper travels through his ear straight to his very core.

He pulls his face back to catch her eyes. He holds her gaze as his finger explores her folds, worshipping every crease. Rey cannot process all this contact or intimacy so she’s left with her instincts. She makes no effort to hide the impact his touch has on her; lips trembling and eyes begging. His deep eyes are a mixture of curiosity and amazement. He’d never have been able to imagine this look on her face but he’ll never let himself forget it. He introduces a second finger to her slick warmth and Rey realizes that her own hand had gone still.

She sets her hand back in motion, this time watching his face. Ben’s look of wonder is overtaken by lust; his eyes darken as his pupils expand and his gentle smile hardens slightly. Rey licks her lips and twists her wrist as she reaches his tip. He growls at the sensation so she does it again but before she can complete the third stroke he slides his two fingers inside of her.

Rey gasps. She has never felt anything like this before. She cannot recall feeling empty before he was inside her but she knows that once he withdraws she’ll feel his absence with every inch of her being . She has to break their eye contact as she wonders just how full he could make her feel. She swallows as the size of the cock in her hand really sinks in. Ben’s free hand presses against her cheek in attempt to get her to look at him again. She shuts her eyes and presses her lips to his, squeezing a little tighter on his dick and increasing her pumps. Precum leaks down her shaft.

He begins moving his fingers in and out of her, discovering his own rythm. His eyebrows knit together as she bites his lip, letting it slowly slide between her teeth as she pulls away. Their eyes find each other again as their chests rise and fall in tandem.

“Do you want-” He begins to question.

“Don’t stop.” She commands.

“Okay.” His face relaxes as he leans in for a softer kiss.

He moves his other hand down to her hip, pressing his thick fingers against the fabric covering her ass. He withdraws his hand from her pants and grabs onto the waistband. She releases her grip on his cock and lifts her hips so he can yank the garment down her toned thighs. Her hips fall back onto her mattress and Ben finds himself kneeling next to her. He scoots back next to her feet and lifts her ankles, freeing them of the fabric pooled there. His hand cradles her right calf as his eyes study the mesmerizing sight of her bare leg. His eyes travel up her heaving chest to meet her eyes once again. He finds that the hunger in his eyes is matched by her own.

Ben places her foot down and reaches across it to press her other leg open. He repositions his weight and climbs over her legs, pressing his wide torso against them. He can feel her inner thighs shaking before she presses them into his side. His hands on either side of her hips, he watches the anticipation build in her eyes before ducking his head down fully into the warmth of her. He presses a few soft experimental kisses into her inner thigh, nibbling slightly. Her toes curl into the mattress below them.

He threads his arms below her legs, wrapping his left hand around the top of her right thigh. He returns his right hand to her slit, watching. His lips fall apart as his fingers slide over her flushed, pulsing skin. He circles the bundle of nerves at the top of her sex.

“Ben…” She moans his name and he presses forward, licking a broad stripe up her sex. Her hands grip the sheets. He laps her up, appreciating the new sweet taste. Her legs lift, ankles crossing over his back. He begins sucking, showing no mercy for how sensitive her nerves are becoming. She gasps and repeats his name over and over again, making herself lightheaded. Her desperation only eggs him on. He swirls his tongue over her clit and sinks his index finger inside her all the way down to the knuckle.

She releases her hands from the sheets, grasping his hair with one and seeking out his hand over her hip with the other. She lifts it away from her body, intertwining their fingers. She squeezes his hand as he begins pumping his finger in and out of her again, quickly reintroducing his second finger.

He reaches out for her mind with their force bond. She lets him in easily and he sees the bright colors dancing before her eyes.

He speaks into her mind,  _ Rey. _ She squeezes his hand tighter.  _ You are so beautiful.  _ He pushes his feelings of adoration across the bond.

She responds, practically in tears.  _ Ben...Don’t stop! _

He slams his fingers into her.

_ I love you too. _

“Ben!”

His mind snaps out of hers as her thoughts dissolve into inexplicable cries and incomprehensible vibrations of her pleasure. He crooks his fingers inside of Rey and her walls shudder around his fingers as she falls off the edge. He sucks hard on her clit and pumps her through her orgasm. His hips roll into the mattress as his aching cock finds some relief. Her breathy moans are enough to make him spill over.

He slows his fingers as she relaxes below him.

Ben slides his fingers out of her and gives a few last thick swipes of her sex. He lifts his head up from between her legs, meeting her eyes. An inescapable sense of pride warms his chest at the content look on her face. His cock twitches at the thought that he was the one to make her come. He climbs back up the bed and lies down on his side. He exhales.

He traces his fingers delicately over the flushed skin of her torso. Her face slowly relaxes and her eyes drift closed. A soft smile spreads across her lips. He watches them part.

“Ben…” his name sounds different this time. It drifts out of her mouth and swirls around him, filling his ears longer than it’s actually spoken.

“Rey.” He answers her, cradling her face with his palm and turning it face towards his.

Her eyes open.

His eyes bore into her with the intensity of what he has to say.

“I’m going to find you. I want to really be there with you.” He wipes away her tear with his thumb. “I want to wake up with you in the morning.”

“Ben you can’t. They’ll kill you or they’ll lock you up or...they’ll make me do it.” It kills her to deny him again but she cannot let her friends be found.

“Meet me somewhere, then. I don’t want the Rebel Alliance. I never did. Just you.” He strokes her cheek before threading his fingers through her hair.

She considers the man before her. His eyes hold immense adoration. His lips beg to be touched again. His jaw trembles in anticipation of her rejection. But what if she didn’t say no? What if, for once, Rey did something for herself and not for parents who were never coming for her or a war that she didn’t even ask for? What if she trusted herself enough to trust Kylo Ren?

“Where?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long to write. In my defense I got into a car accident and it's been extremely stressful. Plus writing smut always takes me extra long because I'm still figuring out my process with it. Hope it was worth the wait!


	5. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey break ties to their respective sides so that they can meet on Naboo.

Ben wakes up the next morning, arms empty.

He calls a meeting.

Officials file into the throne room. They stand in a semi circle around their supreme leader. He is perched on the edge of the oversized throne, back straight and eyes bright. He’s ready to leave this black place.

General Hux folds his arms behind his back and raises his tense jaw.

“Why have you called us here, _Supreme Leader_ ? _”_

Kylo doesn’t miss the mocking way he speaks the formal title.

His voice is sharp in response, “I have discovered the coordinates of the last breath of the rebel alliance. I will depart immediately to destroy them. I trust that you,” his eyes bore into the pale man before him, “ _General Hux_ , have prepared my ship as I previously commanded.”

The other officers in the room shoot looks towards their reddening colleague.

“I...yes, sir. Your ship is ready for you.” Kylo smiles and nods his head. “But if I may, Sir,” Kylo’s smile vanishes, “how exactly did you find them?” Hux’s eyes scan the other beings in the room. Tense eyes meet his own.

Kylo hunches over in his throne, eyes glimmering as they shadow. He considers the spiteful man before him. They’ve known each other for a long time now and he has no doubt that Hux will claim the throne as soon as it’s been vacated.

“My powers are beyond your imagination, general.”

A blonde officer furrows her brows and steps forward, unconcerned with that infamous fury of her superior. “But what does that mean?”

The Supreme Leader jumps to his feet. “It means that I was able to trick the young Jedi girl into telling me where her and her friends are hiding.”

Hux grins. “The Jedi girl? The same one that bested you twice and murdered Snoke?”

Kylo clenches the hilt of his lightsaber and stares at the smug man before him. “She may be strong with the force, but so am I. I will end her. She will not escape me a third time.”

His sharp tone silences the blonde officer as she snaps her mouth shut from the follow up question burning behind her lips. She exchanges a worried glance with the officer to her side.

Kylo sinks back into his throne. “I will depart in an hour. You all may go.”

The group turns to leave but Hux looks over his shoulder before exiting. He sees that all the cracks in Kylo Ren have expanded. He is just as soft as the general had always suspected. Hux shuts the doors behind him, ready for the real work to begin.

Ben pulls his saber off his belt to examine it. He ignites it, fully appreciating the glow and hum of its raw power. He twirls it with his wrist. Eyes on the red blade, he rises to his feet and turns to face the throne. He scans the expanse of black steel and remembers the warped face that used to sit there. He slashes his hand in a savage strike. For a split second everything is still as though his swing missed its mark. He deactivates his blade and in the following silence the back of throne slides. He watches the chunk of throne clunk to the floor before clipping his saber back in place.

He turns his back on the memory of this chair. _Have fun getting comfortable in that, Hux._

 

Rey finds herself bathed in sunlight but it can’t keep away the cold spreading across her skin. She misses those strong arms that had held her all night. She kicks her blanket off, ready to follow the path she’s committed herself to.

She hasn’t amassed many possessions since they’d settled on this planet so it’s not hard for her to grab everything and toss it in her pack. Rey slings the bag over her shoulder and grabs her staff leaning in the corner. She slides her room’s door open. She strides through the halls. She rolls her shoulders back, knowing that she’s about to tell some partial truths if not some flat out lies.

Rey knocks on Poe’s door. She hears grumbling before it slides open and he leans an arm against the jam, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. When he’s cleared them and sees the woman before him his eyes widen.

“Rey! Finally here for that debriefing?” He smirks at her and pushes off from the door, running a hand down his exposed torso.

She grips her staff and follows him into his quarters.

“No.”

His eyebrows jump in surprise and he settles on the edge of the bed, gesturing to a chair for her to take.

Rey continues, “I have to go, Poe.”

He grips his chin and nods. “Where?”

She stares past him, at the window above his bunk. “The force is leading me somewhere. I have to follow it.”

He furrows his eyebrows but nods more vigorously. “And when will you be back?”

“I…” She shifts her eyes back to his.

“You won’t.”

“No, I just-”

“There’s a chance you won’t.”

They scan each other’s expressions; he’s looking for truths and she’s terrified he’ll find them. A sudden anger bubbles up inside of her to mask the fear.

“I don’t belong here! I’m not the Jedi Master you all think I am.”

Silence greets her outburst. She averts her eyes as Poe reads her face. He sees Rey in all her strength but he sees her weakness too. She doesn’t believe in herself. She doesn’t see herself for who she truly is. That she is everything and more than the Jedi savior the resistance needs. Poe Dameron has always known exactly who he was going to be. There was no room for doubt when he told his parents he was going to be the best pilot in the galaxy someday and that he’d fight for the resistance just like them. He doesn’t understand how anyone could not see themselves for who they truly are.

“Fine.” He rummages through his desk until he finds a familiar small pulsing object. “Take this. It’ll help you find us when you’re ready to come back.” He hands her the same tracker bracelet that General Leia had used before when Rey went to find Luke so long ago.

She clutches it in her hand before tossing it into her bag.

“Thank you.” Her eyes avoid his.

Poe crouches down in front of her, holding her gaze. “Don’t forget to say goodbye to Finn.”

She shakes her head, a tear racing down her cheek. “Tell them all I’m sorry.”

Rey turns her back on him and slides the door out of her way.

“Me too.” Poe looks at his empty hands as the door closes.

She glides through the rebel base, eager to leave before running into any of her friends. Someday she’ll be able to explain it all to Finn. She’ll make him understand.

She makes it to the hangar, ducking her head and averting her eyes from the pair of pilots working on their x-wings. She finds the Falcon with Chewbacca standing atop, sparks flying from the welder in his hairy arms. The old ship surely would have fallen apart by now were it not for the wookie’s uncanny dedication to keeping it together.

“Chewie!” She shouts over the screech of machinery.

He powers down and roars at her.

“I need your help.”

He gives a longer roar.

“Not exactly. But I need to find some answers. Meet me in the cockpit?”

The wookie nods and pops open a hatch, descending back into the ship.

Rey looks back. In the distance one of the pilots laughs and grabs another’s shoulder. She averts her eyes, unwilling to allow the longing in them to linger. She pulls the tracker bracelet out of her bag, turning it over in her hands.

 

Hours later Rey begins to slump in the pilot’s chair, eyes growing heavy. Chewbacca lets out a sharp roar, jostling her to sit straight.

“Sorry. I didn’t sleep very well last night.” After Ben had told her to meet him on Naboo they’d just held each other. Although his arms were the most soothing presence she had ever felt, Rey had found it hard to do much more than doze for several minutes at a time. The burning sensation of his fingers innocently tracing her body kept her mind active.

Chewie turns to consider the human beside him. He lets out a trailing roar.

“Are you sure?”

His response is short as he nods and turns back to the controls.

Rey rises from her chair, stretching her arms wide and lengthening her spine towards the ceiling before crumbling forward, muscles relaxed.

“Thank you, Chewie.” She considers the wookie beside her. “For everything.”

He gives a noncommital roar, shaking his head.

Rey turns from the cockpit. She finds her prefered bunk. She sighs and climbs onto the firm mattress, not bothering to remove her overdressings or her boots. It’ll only be a nap. She doesn’t want to leave Chewie alone for too long.

 

Ben finds his eyes drifting over the stars cascading past his ship. The streaks of light attract his weary eyes as his grip relaxes from the controls. His eyes fly wide open when a meteor nearly smashes right into him. He presses his shoulders down and flicks a switch. He leans back in the cockpit, allowing his eyes to drift shut now that he’s activated the auto pilot feature. It should be good enough until he enters Naboo’s atmosphere.

 

Ben and Rey share a dream as their paths careen towards each other. The space between them is dwindling.

Their hands interwoven, they walk towards the setting horizon. They are draped in matching grey robes, twirling and snapping in the strong pull of the wind. His are accented with white lining and paired with his familiar black sleeves, hers are lined in black contrasted by her cream arm wraps. His dark hair is pulled partially back in a single bun; hers falls around her face, free from any restraints. They turn to face each other, his soft eyes meeting her burning ones. They take a breath in sync, feeling their energy flow in harmony. The sensation is warm through their toes and exhilarating through their chests.

They turn away from each other, still anchored by their hands. Rey sees her friends ahead: Finn, Poe, Rose, Chewbacca, BB-8, Leia, and even Han and Luke waiting for her. Ben sees Snoke, Phasma, Hux, and a younger Luke too before the sight of his mother and father on Rey’s side catches his attention. He looks between the grimace of his old mentor and the inviting vulnerability of his parents. Ben looks to the woman’s hand encased within his own and squeezes it. He turns away from the pain of his past.

He takes a step towards the welcoming embrace of the light. Rey smiles as Ben’s shoulder collides with her own. He leans into her, letting her unique energy guide him.

Rey watches Ben reach towards his family, ready for him to finally find the belonging he’s always had. That same belonging she’s been searching for.

Their audience disappears.

His hand floats in the empty air. Rey presses into his side. She uses her free hand to pull his face towards hers. Matching tears streak their faces. They relinquish their hold on eachother to open their arms and fold into one another.

 

Their eyes open to find their embrace is solid and real. Neither hesitates to tighten their arms around each other’s backs. Ben shakes with the heavy sobs rippling through his body, surprised to find Rey’s body trembling in his arms.

It is rare to need someone and be needed by them with the same intensity in a single moment.

Neither says a word. They simply hold each other and cry themselves out. Neither is ready to say what must be said. They cling to their past selves, knowing that as soon as they reach each other they will never go back.

Ben drifts in and out of sleep. His excitement builds each time he opens his eyes to find Rey’s peaceful warmth still beside him and he remembers their mutual destination. He eventually cannot fall back asleep. Instead he caresses her skin and threads her hair between his fingers, enjoying the electric hum of her energy coursing through his body.

Her eyes flutter open, just as soft as the brown pair greeting hers. She stretches and he nearly cries out from how adorable she looks as she yawns. She smiles and settles back into his chest, pulling him closer.

They both hear Chewbacca roar from the other room.

He twists his head and kisses her forehead.

“See you soon.”

Rey’s arm falls to her bunk and she glares accusingly at the empty space where Ben had been just a moment ago.

Chewbacca roars again and she rolls onto her back.

“I’m coming!”

Rey gasps as she enters the cockpit. The scene before her is stunning. Naboo must be the most beautiful planet in the galaxy. All the greenery of Takadona meets her sparkling eyes. Massive bodies of water spread past their view port; Rey has never imagined this much water existing in the same place. She sinks into her chair and watches in astonishment as the water eventually fractures into a network of rivers, racing each other until only a few remain.

Chewbacca roars as the uniquely rounded architecture of Theed appears on the horizon.

“It’s beautiful.”

He shrugs and roars in response.

“I’ll have to come visit you then.”

His answering roar is outraged.

She keeps her head fixed straight ahead, avoiding his gaze. “I’m not going back, Chewie. I need to find my place and it’s not there. I just don’t belong, no matter how much I wish I did. The Falcon is yours. Go home. Go back to Kashyyyk.”

He turns to her, fists clenched. He lets out a long series of roars.

Rey lets a tear run down her cheek, catching over the rigid cut of her tense jaw. She turns to look him in the eyes.

“Okay. I’ll keep it, but only for now.”

He nods and turns back to the controls.

 

The wookie helps her find a secluded field to land the ship in. She helps him fill his satchel with supplies.

Rey senses Ben before he appears in the viewport. He halts the four legged scaly creature that’s carried him from the city, sliding down its side. His black robes rustle in the gentle breeze rippling across the field. His hair is nicer than she’s seen it in a long time. She’s grown used to the chaotic rustled look his locks get from sleep.

She exhales and grabs her own arm. She leaves the cockpit to see Chewbacca giving his final sweep of the Millenium Falcon. She walks to his side and they exchange a glance. He nods.

She walks him down the ramp, stopping before it drops off so that she’s almost as tall as him. Ben hangs back, unsure how the wookie will receive him. Chewbacca turns to Rey and hugs her so tightly that her lungs fail to pull air in for a split second. He gives a soft roar and gently sets her back on her feet.

“Goodbye, Chewie.”

He wheels around and stomps up to Ben who steels himself. The wookie roars and grabs the man’s arms, roughly pulling him in for an even tighter embrace. Chewie’s hand comes up to cradle the man’s head, remembering just how tiny this boy used to be. He pulls back, still holding on to the man’s shoulders and searching his familiar eyes. Ben holds on to the pair of hairy arms, smiling as nostalgia rolls through him.

His smile breaks.

“I’m sorry.”

Chewbacca roars and pulls him in for another, gentler hug. He ruffles the human’s hair, ruining its perfectly windblown effect. Rey smiles to herself on the ramp. The wookie mounts the waiting quadruped and roars once more before riding off.

They watch him disappear into the thick line of trees and stare at the empty landscape as the tension thickens. They break at the same time. Rey flies down the last bit of ramp as Ben wheels around and runs to her. They crash into each other, her arms wrapping around his neck as his weave around her back in a vice tight grip, lifting her up. He doesn’t even realize that he’s spun them around until he sets her back down and finds himself facing away from the ship.

Their eyes find each other seconds before their lips. They latch on to each other more desperately than their first kiss. Their lips move smoothly in tandem as they both find the tingling sensation they’ve grown accustomed to was not just a byproduct of their force bond.

They finally pull their mouths apart, laughing softly into each other. His hands hold her face, just as he’s done before but this time he can truly feel the smoothness of her skin. He didn’t know what he’d been missing before but now he can’t imagine ever going back. She runs her hands over either side of his broad waist.

His voice is incredulous as he breaks the silence, “You came.”

She looks up at him, hands sliding up to rest over his shoulder blades. “So did you.”

He breaks out in a smile again, bending forward to kiss her nose.

She pulls back from him, allowing his hands to slide down her shoulders and arms so that she can cradle his hands in her own.

Rey swallows before speaking. “I’ve waited my whole life for this feeling. For someone to come back for me. For someone to care enough. I never thought it would be you,” her throat clenches as a fresh tear rolls down her cheek, “but I’m so glad that it is.”

He pulls her hands into his chest, hunching over her so that her vision fills with his face. “Rey I’m never going to leave you. You’ll never be alone again. I won’t let you.”

He presses a soft kiss to her lips, pulling back just far enough to watch her hazel eyes. They burn with their vulnerability but gradually relax as his hands don’t loosen their hold on her. It’s so nice to be held. A fierce warmth swells in her chest and Rey promises herself that she’ll never let anything hurt the man in her arms again.

Rey responds, “neither will you.”

He closes his eyes and rests his forehead on hers.

She speaks softly, “it’s nice to finally be on the same page for once.”

Ben bends over and sweeps her up into his arms. She grabs his robe in shock. He smirks, remembering how different everything was the last time he carried her like this.

“ _Very_ nice.”

He carries her onto the Millenium Falcon, a ship which holds unfathomable significance to Ben Solo. But somehow as he feels that connection to his past wash over his mind, to his father and his mother and his childhood, Ben knows he’s not that boy anymore. The anger of Kylo Ren still burns within him but he finds that the realness of the woman in his arms has drained all the bitterness from him. He is a new man, ready to start something new from the fractured pieces of both their pasts.

Rey’s hands on his cheeks guide his eyes to hers.

“We’ll figure it out.”

He nods, throat tightening.

“Together.”

She strokes his scar.

“Together.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this time I have an even better excuse for the late update. My computer broke and it’s going to take at least 2 weeks to fix
> 
> 3/20 finally had a chance to go back and fix the formatting on this one. New chapter coming soon! Hopefully tonight.


	6. Varykino

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey find themselves quite distracted from the beauty of the Amidala family lake house at Varykino as they finally have a chance to touch each other without lightyears of distance between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note the updated tags. This is the chapter where things finally get explicit!

Ben tightens his grip on the controls of his father’s ship. He locks his jaw as the memories of sitting on his father’s lap flood his mind. His hands had been so much smaller back then, struggling to wrap around the controls. He blinks rapidly. Ben taps his fingers along their grip to loosen their tension. He can feel Rey’s nervous looks as her skilled hands work over her own sections of controls.

“Where exactly are you taking me?”

“It’s an old place. It belongs to...my family. No one’s been there in years.” He doesn’t risk a glance at her expression; knowing that her bright, curious eyes will only bring tears to his.

Rey watches the lakes and mountains fly past the viewport, blurring into a gorgeous tapestry of blues and greens and every other color she’s ever dared to dream of. She tugs lightly on their bond, tasting the thoughts that plague the surface of his mind.

“You’ve only been there once.”

“No.”

Before Rey can ask, he continues. “I can only remember the last visit. My-” he spits the next word out, having to drag it from clenched teeth, “ _ parents _ used it as a vacation home frequently up until I...up until the force started making me too unpredictable a child for unnecessary travel.”

Rey watches his face, biting back every word fighting to comfort him. She’s afraid that she’ll say the wrong thing and he’ll stop talking.

He closes his eyes briefly, a distant and oddly youthful smile playing across his lips. “We were happy here.”

Rey’s own lips twitch at the peaceful look that’s overcome him.

Ben’s eyes open again and harden as he refocuses on the manageable mechanical task of piloting. “We’re here.”

The couple land the Falcon with expert finesse, despite never having flown together before. They are able to read each other in flight just as well as in fight. Silence cuts through the ship as the engines power down. Ben lets his hand slide off the controls and rest on his thigh, nervous fingers playing with the hem of his tunic. Rey readjusts her hips in her seat and presses her palms onto the control panel, pelvis tilted forward. Her back arches enticingly, emphasizing her toned curves.

Some thought jolts the man. He tilts his head towards his co-pilot. He’s still waiting for the rejection.

“Shall we?” He offers his hand timidly, allowing the vulnerability of his naked and outstretched hand hang in the air between the pair.

Rey enlists all her willpower to turn and face him. She watches the gradually softening of his eyes as she takes his hand. They rise in unison, bodies pressing together in the tight space between their chairs. Pink flashes across her cheeks at the warmth of him, remembering all the times she’d held this towering man in her arms. It’s much better to watch his eyes and feel the affection behind them than being hindered by his subconscious.

He could never be close enough.

Their hands weave between their chests; pressed together by the firmness of his and the more forgiving nature of hers.

He tilts his head down, breathing in her overwhelmingly comforting scent. She smells like the single flower that blooms in a barren landscape after the first rainfall in decades. He rests his forehead against hers. Ben releases a hand to press into the sharp dip of her waist, guiding her into the open space beyond their chairs.

“Ben.”

Rey lifts up onto her toes, fighting against his ridiculous stature to bring her burning lips closer to his.

“Rey.”

He presses his arm into her lower back, supporting her reach and meeting it by ducking his chin.

Their lips meet.

They wash over each other, savoring each little sensation. The kiss is slow and overwhelming. She presses her hips into his body, fully trusting her weight in his arms. He feels a very distinct surge within his abdomen.

He twists to the side of her and draws the warm woman up to cradle her in his arms. She is already lightheaded so it takes Rey a moment to fully process that her body has actually been moved. Rey is not used to being carried so she readjusts, trying to make herself somehow lighter as he takes her through the ship.

“What are you doing?” She tries to sound annoyed but the words come out much too breathy.

“You didn’t seem to mind this so much last time.” He grins at her, enjoying the disheveled look in her eyes and the way a few strands have come loose from her buns to whisper across her temple and her cheeks.

“Last time?”

“Yes, you wouldn’t remember that. You  _ were _ passed out after all.”

Her lips squish together, growing plump and making his heart race. He needs to get her off this damn ship.

He answers her unasked question. “Takodana. How did you think I got you to that interrogation table?” He flicks the ramp switch the force. It moves much too slowly for the electric sensation racing through his veins.

A fresh wave of blood flushes her cheeks as the realization hits her. “You’ve been attracted to me since the beginning.”

He carries her down the ramp, watching the incredulous look on her face. “And you weren’t?” His brow cocks in a hollow challenge. He’s hiding the deep fear that he’s somehow misread every moment the two have shared behind a cocky bravado, something he clearly learned from his father.

Rey presses her lips into a thin line, considering. “I didn’t understand back then.”

“Neither did I, not really.” He stops as his feet touch down on solid ground.

Their eyes lock and she relaxes into his grip, allowing her hands to trace the rough fabric of his robes and slide together around the back of his neck.

“Rey.” His voice sounds oddly constricted.

“Yes?”

The pair’s eyes beg what their bodies cannot. They would rather be forced to fight each other again than have their bodies separated once more.

Some madness overtakes him.

Ben speaks the hopeful though plaguing his mind, “we’re going to wake up next to each other in the morning.”

She laughs to cut the intensity of his gaze. The soft golden tint to his eyes and the gentle line of his lips is too much for Rey. 

“Only if we sleep together.”

She meant it to lighten the mood but her challenge has the inverse effect. His eyelids slide partially down, masking his warm eyes in a sudden dark desire.

“That can be arranged.”

Ben presses his lips to hers in earnest now, trying to show her just how much his very skin craves her. She gets the message.

Their mouths become harsh as the passion that’s always burned between the pair seeps into their lips. He gently slides her bottom lip through his teeth, sending sparks across their bond. Rey presses her hands into his neck, pulling him ever closer. His dark hair brushes past his cheek, tickling her own. She frees a hand to tuck the errant lock of hair back behind his adorably oversized ear. She relishes the feel of his smooth skin softening the harsh cut of his jaw. She is so distracted by the feel of him she doesn’t even register that he’s started moving again.

He carries her across a grand patio overlooking a sparkling lake. A small voice in his head tells him he should prompt her to take in the gorgeous view; he knows how much the sight of water and mountains impress her. However, when he breaks his lips from hers he only makes it a few inches away, her wide eyes demanding more.

“I wasn’t done.” Her voice is deep and commanding in a way he’s never heard it before. He feels a warmth twist within his core and presses his lips back to hers. He will do whatever this woman commands him to do.

Neither Ben nor Rey get to take in the spectacular sight of the sunset over Varykino. The vivid burning of sharp pinks that are nearly red and hazardous oranges fight and blend across the skies above. The lake reflects the colors in stark contrast to the deep blue of its waters. The mountains cut off the sun, magnifying its last breath of fire sinking below the horizon. By the time the deep purple and blue night sky have chased away the last tendrils of the sunset, the pair are already inside the house.

He carries her up an elegantly curving staircase. It’s a good thing that he remembers his family’s vacation home so well, otherwise he definitely would have tripped by now.

Rey’s hands grip the hairs at the bottom of his neck. He savors the sweet sharpness of her pull. He exhales into her mouth, a voiceless moan. She bites his lip, craving something more carnal than his soft lips pressed to hers. He senses her desire, can feel it consuming him through their bond. The fire ignites his own cravings. He holds the feeling back. He’s promised himself that they will make it to the bedroom.

She has no time to worry about semantics.

She releases a hand from his neck, returning it to his chest. Rey presses into the solid reality of Ben’s chest, wishing for the life of her that his skin was not covered. His mouth drifts away from hers.

“I need to focus,” he breathes into her ear.

“Yeah, me too.”

She moves her mouth to his neck, brushing the hypersensitive skin with her response. She slides her right knee across his torso, hooking both her legs around his back

Ben halts, shutting his eyes. He tilts his head back and leans into the wall. He takes a deep breath to steady himself as her lips suck greedily just at the spot he most craves.

“Rey.” It feels like he screams but it comes out a whisper.

She works her way around his exposed flesh, devouring him. She’s clearly unafraid to leave her mark.

He squeezes his hold on her ass, savoring the taught mixture of muscle and fat. He focuses and resumes his task of getting her to a bed.

_ A bed. _

_ A bed, a bed, a bed. _

Rey’s lips burn their way across his neck.

Fire rips through his abdomen as she dips her fingers under his collar, brushing his bare skin with insistent fingertips. He force-slams the bedroom doors open. They bounce off the walls, drifting lazily. An exhilarating breath fills his lungs as the accomplishment of getting her to this room hits him. Ben grips the back of her neck, pulling her away.

“Rey,” he tries again.

She looks beyond irritated. She’s ready to use the force to throw him across the room but before she can make the move he nods his head behind her. She follows his prompt, arms slackening at the sight before her eyes.

The moonlight slants through open doors, playing across sheer curtains drifting into the room with the warm breeze. She can feel the comforting temperature send waves of raised skin across her exposed shoulders. She wants to feel that sweet breeze drift over her entire body.

Beyond the doors awaits pitch black water. A deep resolve promises Rey that she’ll explore that particular inviting darkness another time. For now, the object right in front of her eyes beckons stronger.

Rey was unaware that beds came this large.

The mere sight of it is intimidating, not only for its size but also for the alluring springy firmness of it. She can practically feel the way its deep blue sheets will caress her back as the arms around her press her burning body into it. Rey’s jaw slackens at the image as her head jerks back to meet Ben’s eyes. He watches her expectantly.

“What do you think?”

“Ben.”

He nuzzles his nose against hers. He’ll never tire of watching his name leave her lips. She grabs his neck, pulling his plump lips back to hers.

His neck strains in its earnest effort to press his mouth closer to hers. He pours the sweet aching of his heart into the gentle kiss. Her hand worries over his covered bicep, wondering why his wonderfully soft skin is still hidden away from her touch. She pulls back from him, intending to ask him to take his shirt off but at the pure look of hunger in his dark eyes the words catch in her throat. Rey can’t help but stare, mesmerized by his all consuming desire. She swallows, nerves shooting cold shocks through her arms and into her fingers. The warmth between her thighs grows uncomfortably hot in contrast as her head spins. She needs space; she’s drowning in this man. She presses a hand into his chest and he allows her to lower her legs.

She immediately resents the distance between them. That burning spot throbs painfully as she attempts a deep breath. His hands run over her arms, tracing the dots of raised flesh on the exposed sections of her upper arms. He stills his large hands over her much more compact ones. Ben recognizes the terror flashing in her hazel eyes. He can feel it ripping through the burning of his own skin with an ice cold sensation the only succeeds in edging his desire with a white hot anxiety.

“We don’t have to right now.” Her eyes twist in hurt and he hurries to tack on, “Or ever.”

Rey steels herself. She tilts her chin up to meet his torturously soft expression. She pulls his hands with hers as she backs up until her legs bump into the bed.

“I want to.” He still looks unconvinced. “This is what I want.  _ You _ are what I want, Ben.”

He can’t help but smile at that increasingly familiar sound of his name and once he’s started a smile under her gaze it has no choice but to take over his entire face.

“And I want you too, Rey. All of you. However much you’ll give me.”

“You know you can take whatever you want.” Rey watches him carefully, allowing the moment before they act to burn into her memory.

Her hands release his to find his belt. He feels a pleasant pressure as her fingers dig in between his buckle and the layers of fabric below it. She unclasps the leather band, his robes loosening from his waist. He watches the careful determination of a Rey focused on a mechanical task. Her deft hands methodically part his layers, revealing his toned chest. Ben feels the ghost of self consciousness but it never truly touches him because the admiration in her gaze is vastly different from the embarrassment she’d shown the first time that she’d seen his bare torso.

Rey’s fingers fan out across the firm cut of his pecs. She cannot believe the feeling of his bare skin on her fingertips is real. She runs her hands down his abs, stopping just above the waist of his pants. Her hands rest there as she loses her momentum, distracted by what waits below. Ben bends his head down to kiss her forehead, wishing she would continue her hands’ journey down south. Instead, she looks up, pressing her lips to his and sliding her warm hands up his chest.

Rey pushes her hands to his shoulders as her lips work around his. She pushes his robes off, exposing Ben’s torso completely to her whim. He shudders at how pleasant it is to be this exposed to her in full consciousness, his tongue coming to lick the bottom of her upper lip in a wordless request. Rey acquiesces, opening her mouth just slightly but Ben takes full advantage, pressing his entire tongue into her mouth. His hands begin to rub against the multi textured fabrics that cover her back, wondering when she’ll remove those.

Her hands sweep back to his chest and press firmly, forcing him to sit on the side of the bed. He traces the enticing curve of her upper thighs, even so much as daring to feel the magnificent curve of her ass with barely trembling hands. His eyes level with her stomach so he sharply tilts his head up to meet her gaze once more. Rey’s hands slide past his upper cheek bones to thread into his luscious hair. She squeezes and kneads the black hair, worshipping the texture as she watches an easy pleasure overcome his hooded eyes at the sensation.

Ben raises his hands to her hips, pressing his fingertips underneath her tunic. Rey doesn’t stop him so he proceeds, sliding his hands higher and dragging the fabric with them. He bunches the tunic as well as the overwraps to pool around her thin column of a neck. His fingers caress the delicate surface of her neck before slipping back under the fabric to push it over her head. His eyes meet the obstacle that is her breast wrap and he takes a deep breath, not quite ready to see and feel that part of her yet. She presses her body forward, the supple softness of their chests finding each other in a fully intoxicating sensation.

His arms slide easily around her waist, feeling the steep incline of her lower back. A slice of moonlight traces a sharp diagonal line below her eyes and his nose to come to a stop at his shoulder, right over his scar. He brings his hands to grip the flesh of her upper hips so that he can pull Rey into his lap. She follows his pull, knees resting on either side of his hips. The action opens her crotch over his, a large firmness meeting her damp aching softness. The pair gasp at the sensation, grinding into each other in an instinctual dash for more friction.

Ben’s fingers dig into her hips, matching the strength of her own grip on his shoulders. She opens her mouth, lips curling expectantly into the thin space above Ben’s mouth. He savors the undeniably sexual sight of her mouth forming a wide oval before jolting his chin upwards to catch her bottom lip with his teeth.

She shudders at the harsh sensation.  _ More.  _ She raises her arms to cradle his head and guide it so that her tongue can explore every angle of his electrifyingly sweet mouth.  _ More.  _ She presses her chest flush to his, soft skin burning against each other. The angle of her pelvis makes her ass stick out round and firm in his grip as her folds press tightly together, his cock tightening under her weight.  _ More. _ She leans into him, knocking him onto his back and following closely herself. 

He lifts his mouth to her ear, breath stroking her delicate skin with creeping tendrils of warmth. “More.” It’s only a whisper but she feels it within her own blood as a scream.

She moans in response, his lips moving to her neck. He navigates the sensitive flesh, chasing her irrepressible bursts of sound. His hands slide over the slim curve of her waist, thumbs pressing into the base of her sternum while his fingertips rest in the ridges of her spine. She desperately wants those hands to explore just a little higher but their owner is too focused on leaving his mark on her neck. She traces his triceps down to his elbows, lifting them ever so slightly, bringing them into contact with the bottom of her breast wrap. His right index finger is jammed under the fabric from the motion.

Ben bites down on her flesh, the adrenaline of what she’s asking overcoming him. She gasps, surprised that something so sharp could feel so good. His fingers scramble at the base of her wrap, searching for the loose end before she can change her mind and push him away. She rests her hands on his shoulders, overwhelmed by how large they are as well as his lips continuing to explore her neck and his fingers unraveling her chest. He gets the wrap around a few times, growing frustrated by how far their bodies have to separate to get it around her. He grips the top segments, tugging until they come loose and slide down her frame.

He pulls his mouth back from her neck, meeting her eyes. He finds no trace of the vulnerability or timidness that he’d expected. He can feel it radiating from her but something else overpowers it. Her blown pupils have made her eyes even darker with an impatient challenge. All the power of her gaze drains as his warm digits slide over her supple flesh. His hands cradle the weight of her breasts. She huffs, eyes shutting so she can concentrate on the feel of him and block out the overwhelming look of absolute worship in his own eyes. Ben squeezes her slightly as he turns his wrist so that his thumbs run over the small points of both her nipples. She gasps again at how the texture of his coarse thumbs prickle. His stiff cock pulses at the sound, driving him forward in a mad need to have her beneath him, fully exposed.

His hands squeeze her breasts tightly, causing her to squirm above him.

“Ben,” her voice begs for more and he aches to give it to her.

He grunts, the base animalistic sound vibrating against her.

“Take your pants off,” he commands.

She stands. He sits up, his body following hers. The loose wrappings of her breast band fall to the floor. He watches, mouth slightly parted as Rey presses the waistbands of her pants and underwear down in one fluid motion. She extracts her feet, taking a centering breath. His eyes are heavy against her fully exposed form so she throws his torso back down, straddling him once more. He breathes her in for a moment, lips meeting in a surprisingly tender kiss. She lowers her hips to grind her bare pussy against him once more. This time though the excessive moisture soaks through the fabric of his pants.

He flips them over, pressing her back into the mattress. Ben ruts against her violently, driven mad by her panting and her fingers gripping and scratching at his back and neck. She rakes her nails down his back in one long scratch, looping her fingers underneath his waistband, sliding them around his back to his sides. She grips the fabric and pulls down.

“Rey,” he whines.

He needs to give her fingers free range. He wants them to explore. He bolts upright, yanking his pants out of the way. He presses his hands on either side of her head and lowers himself back down, pelvis hovering above Rey’s.

Anticipation builds thick.

She’s too afraid to look between them, the reality of his exposed cock too much for her to handle. Instead she reaches shaky hands between them, bumping against the hard flesh floating inches away from her pulsating sex. She wraps both her hands around him, cheeks burning as she realizes that it’s not enough to encase him completely. She’d had some sense of how large he was from how close their bodies pressed together in sleep but this was insane.

She blurts out incredulously, “how is this supposed to fit inside of me?”

Her cheeks burn as her ears register what her mouth just said.

He presses his nose into her neck, intending to suppress a laugh. However, the desire evaporates before it can fully form as her words conjure up the image of her taking him. He nuzzles her, bringing his mouth to her ear again so he can whisper. His words drip with unsuppressed longing.

“You can do it.” He breathes in her solid earthy scent. “You can take me.”

Rey swallows, involuntarily clenching her pussy, the sensitive skin crying out over the tension.

The lust in his voice is infectious. “All of me.”

Rey has never been so strongly desired by someone before. From their first meeting he’s had this deep primal need for her. She finally allows herself to fully feel it too. She forgets the timid fears of her first time. She lets go of that young girl who doesn’t know yet how to trust her body in this way.

She circles the head of Ben’s cock over her clit before guiding it down to her opening. He moans, gripping the sheets as he fights the instinct to buck his hips. She slowly plays the substantial width of his tip over her entrance, allowing it to stretch her gently. The sharpness is intoxicating. He watches the intense concentration as long as he can stand it before putting his lips into action. He attacks her mouth and she lets go, bracing herself on his broad shoulders. She brakes the kiss to meet his eyes. Some part of her registers that she’s looking Ben Solo in the eyes as he’s just barely inside of her. She’s never felt so connected to the universe around her. The sense of belonging is far too much.

She nods slightly. His eyes are soft, betraying the gentleness of a man who’s never lost that pure heart of his youth. He watches her eyes roll back as he pushes forward excruciatingly slow, savoring the slide of her tight walls taking him in. He reaches a tight stop and her head snaps back up, a loud extended gasp escaping her lips as he fills her completely. Her hands fly over his back, eyes wild as she panics. This is too much. There’s too much of him but it’s not enough and if he left her right now her pain would split the galaxy in two. Her fingers tear at his skin, trying to find purchase and failing. 

Ben gasps at the desperation exuding from the woman beneath him before gathering himself. He balances on one hand to hold her cheek in his other. “Shhh, shhh. Relax, Rey. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Tears rim his eyes as he watches pain and pleasure fight across her face. Her eyes find his. She relaxes into his grip and for one brief moment there is utter peace. Just Ben and Rey; their bodies as connected as their minds for once. And then that relaxation causes him to slide in a little further and Rey doesn’t hold back her moan one bit. The sound fills their ears. Ben will never forget it; will always strive, in everything that he does going forward, to elicit that sound from her once again.

Rey raises her knees to press into his side, hooking her ankles over his lower back. She runs her hands unabashedly over his body, worshipping the muscle and the soft glide of his skin while memorizing the raised puckering of his plethora of scars. The reality of his very flesh grounds her as the sensation of his cock filling her pushes her to the edge.

He watches her, trying to read her rapidly shifting expression. He’s so afraid to lose control and hurt her that he ignores her increasingly loud desire begging him through their bond.

She concentrates for a moment, pulling in a deep breath. “Please.” She squeezes his shoulder. “Please, Ben,” a panicked gasp escapes after his name, “don’t stop!”

Determination clouds his innocent gaze. His eyes widen as Ben Solo presses his weight into his hands on either side of the woman beneath him. He rolls his hips, building a rythym even as he presses deeper within her warmth. He finally sheathes himself completely within her grip, a reprieve of relief washing over the both of them.

“Ahhhh, Ben!” She moans, eyes shutting.

He breathes a response, her name drifting from his lips and into the thick air between them.

Her hands press a needy trail across his skin. One travels to the nape of his neck so it can fist and twist the soft tendrils of hair there. The other hand comes back to brace against the solid mass of his shoulder.

He takes in the sight of Rey beneath him; a pleasured smile twists her pink lips and despite her shut eyes he can feel the demand behind them. She wants more of him. She rolls her hips, creating a new sensation between the two of him that makes Ben abandon his mission to be gentle with her.

He thrusts into her, hard. His rythym dissolves. He does his best to slide in and out of her slick heat as fast as his hips can get there.

She gasps his name out again, lips eagerly seeking his.

Their mouths meet in a searing kiss. They tilt their heads, unable to keep them steady as their bodies crest below.

The tight knot within Ben’s abdomen begins to pulse. He feels his release building as he can feel Rey’s. She weaves her hands around his back to splay against his shoulder blades. He lowers his chest to hers, cradling her head with one hand and getting a firm hold on her hip with the other. The position allows Rey to feel his girth slide against her trembling walls more vividly. It also allows him to gain even more momentum.

He dips in and out of her so quickly that his firm cock constantly vibrates against her. Rey’s eyes fly open and she takes in his determined eyes looking right back at hers. Ben’s eyes widen at the contact, white rimming the otherwise black darkness. His thrusts falter as he frantically presses his face into her hair. His moan is hot and loud in her ear.

She clings to him as her walls take on a mind of their own; gripping and fluttering about the surging hardness sliding past. His whole body shudders as he thrusts his pelvis deeper against hers, savoring the tight sensation of her grip as he falls over the edge.

The wave of his cum filling her deeper and leaking out between the two of them snaps the last thread of Rey’s hold on rationality. She screams into the gentle drape of the canopy above their heads, feeling all for the world as though her ecstacy should set it all on fire.

Ben and Rey hold each other as he rocks into her comforting warmth for the last few strokes. He stills within her, pressing a delicate kiss to her lips as he eases out. She gasps around his mouth at the loss; a sharp pain beats through her entrance. He presses his lips deeper to hers, rolling onto his back and pulling her along. Her body relaxes over his torso, melting into the wide solid mass of his chest. Her breathing calms as the time between their kisses gradually expands. Finally they pull far enough apart to lock eyes again.

Ben speaks first. “Was that...okay?” His hands stroke tentatively at her back, completely unaware of how electrifying the slide of his fingertips over her skin truly is.

Rey cups his cheek with her right hand. He instinctually shuts his eyes and leans into her hand. A small smile sneaks across his lips.

“Ben.”

His eyes flutter open.

“That was  _ perfect. _ ” Rey captures his lips in a passionate kiss.

Their bodies meld, cradling each other. Ben tucks his head on top of hers, pulling Rey into the shelter of his broad chest. She rubs her nose against his cooling skin and presses her hips forward, embracing his hold. Matching smiles, small and bright pull at their lips.

Rey traces her fingertips slowly across the exposed skin in front of her face.

“See you in the morning.”

His smile widens and his grip tightens on her.

“I’ll see you in my dreams, sweetheart.”

Her heart swells at the sound of the pet name. She presses her lips to his chest before pulling back to answer.

“Race you there, Ben.”

Their minds drift together into subconsciousness; their force bond rippling with power from their physical forms finally being united. In sleep the pair face each other in uncomplicated parallel. Their chins tilt up to bring their closed eyes level. Their hands intertwine. Their hips meet, legs interwoven. As they form positions familiar from their teleporting dreams the air stills around their bodies. The sheer power of their union halts any disturbances, curtains falling still despite the strong wind blowing past the balcony.

At first neither feels the screeching pull of a nightmare.

Eventually the anxieties of reality break their shared peace however.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say that I think this piece is coming to a close. Probably only one or two chapters more but I am already planning out an extensive multi chapter fic with Jedi Knight Ben and Smuggler Rey. I would like to thank everyone for your support thus far and ask that you hang in for just a little longer as I wrap this up! Your comments are really what kept me going when I wanted to just abandon this work and start on my next one. <3


	7. Legacies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dream and 2 nightmares.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited update! Sorry this took so long. I hope people are still reading! I wrote and rewrote this chapter so many times that I now have over 7,000 words of unused material for this fic. So this is unedited because I'm worried if I don't post it now I'll just rewrite it again. The good news is some of that extra material is the beginnings of the final chapter so don't give up on me yet! We're getting there.

Wind ruffles through Ben’s hair and the grass at his feet. He smiles softly at the waves of hills disappearing into the distance. He knew this place when he was a child. His mother used to chase him across these plains and they would roll down the mounds together and she would let him decorate her hair with wildflowers. 

But his mother isn’t here this time.

He knows its not her that pulls him forward. He can sense Rey; he knows that her presence is what provokes his anxiety ridden sense of urgency.

His lengthy limbs easily traverse the rise and fall of hills as he chases that feeling that is so inexplicably her. It’s that first rain in years, watching clouds float by, stomach flipping from dropping out of light speed feeling.

He finds himself looking down at her from a peak. She’s cross legged with her back to him in the middle of a stunning kaleidoscope of wildflowers. Ben goes to her.

When she hears him get close Rey lies down on her back to watch him approach upside down. His natural scowl is much less intimidating from this angle. He comes to a halt right above her, enraptured by her pure and radiating smile.

“Ben.” She says his name like she hasn’t seen his face in years. She says his name like this is the hundredth time she’s said it today alone. She says his name like it’s the only one she knows.

He sinks to his knees before her, caressing her peaceful face. He’s always so gentle, even though he knows he couldn’t harm her even if he tried. She reaches for his arm and tugs, guiding him to lie beside her. Their heads ear to ear and toes reaching in opposite directions, the pair watch puffs of white drift by and morph into ever changing puzzle pieces.

Ben’s voice is quiet as he releases his nagging thought, “my mother and I used to do this.”

Rey turns her head to watch his troubled profile flash to anger and then nostalgia before settling on a bitter sorrow.

“The few times we came to Varykino she and I would try to take picnics. After we ate we would watch the sky and she would tell me stories.”

Rey has fully rolled onto her side, propped up on her elbow. She watches him watch the clouds.

“My favorite was about a young princess.” He grins but water pools at his eyes. “She was brave and fierce and fiery and she lost everything but she never gave up.”

Rey reaches out to glide her fingers through his soft waves of hair. “She sounds amazing.”

“She was. She didn’t stop at being a princess, either. That wasn’t enough for her so she learned how to fight too.”

Rey traces his lips with just the faintest touch. He looks up through his eyelashes at her in utter disbelief at the raw affection he finds there.

“When I was young,” she tilts her head as though it will help the memories fall out, “I met another girl my age. I let her share my shelter for a time and tried to teach her how to scavenge. She didn’t seem to care about survival though. She told me that someday a prince would come and whisk her away from Jakku and put her in a pretty dress and she’d never have to climb through wrecks or clean spare parts or run through deserts again.” Rey looks off at the gently curving horizon. “She said I’d find a prince too, if I were lucky.”

He suppresses a smile before asking, “and what did you say to that?”

“I told her she was stupid and that was kidnap.”

The laugh breaks free of him.

She continues on, softer now. “But at night, when I was alone and it was cold and dark and I wished it wasn’t, I would wonder: What would it be like? What would a prince look like? What would I look like beside him? Maybe I could be happy. He could help me find my family.” Her fingers still in his hair and her gaze is fixed far beyond him. “I didn’t really want a prince but some part of me liked the fantasy.”

Rey’s eyes slide back to his and they watch each other, unguarded and understanding.

“I’m technically the prince of Alderaan.” He says, completely flat.

“Oh is that so?” Rey’s eyebrows rise and a playful smirk twists her lips. “Then where’s your crown?” She ruffles his hair in the exact spot a crown would rest.

“It’s only an honorary title.”

She grins wickedly at him squirming beneath her teasing. “King Ben needs his crown!”

Rey gets to her feet.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” He smiles at her charade; it’s a soft and untroubled smile that feels so unfamiliar upon his lips that he can actually feel his chest lighten. 

“No, no! Don’t worry your highness, I shall fetch your crown and place it upon your head.” Ben sits up, catching her hips and pulling her down on top of him. The two shake into one another, laughter stealing all their oxygen and making their bellies sore. Rey balances her forehead against his and presses a hand into his chest to steady herself.

 

When she opens her eyes the dream is gone.

 

The girl from Jakku points at her, tears streaming down her face. She screams, “You killed them! You killed them all!”

Horrified, Rey turns and sees bodies scattered amongst the sand. Some are partially buried, features hidden from view.

The girl sinks to her knees, crying into her hands. Rey walks to her and rests her hand atop the girl’s head but she grabs Rey’s silken skirts. Rey panics and tries to back out of the girl’s grip. She clenches tighter, dragging the dress down and Rey with it.

“Look what you’ve done!”

Rey twists away from the girl, her gown ripping in the process. The girl clutches the soft pink fabric to her chest, cradling it as though it were her salvation. Rey stumbles through the sand towards the nearest body, wind whipping sand across her face and stinging the abundance of flesh bared by her ridiculous garment.

She kneels before the body, swiping away the sand. Her hands become frantic as dark skin and a familiar brown jacket reveal themselves beneath her touch.

“Finn? Finn?!” Rey hugs his body to her own, horrified by how cold he feels despite lying out in the desert.

The girl wails from the distance.

“This can’t be right.” Rey looks up at the field of what was once the resistance. Her cheeks are soaked and her eyes burn. She looks back to the man in her arms. She watches his lifeless body and feels the memory of his death; painful but unafraid; within herself. Her body convulses around her sobs.

 

Ben sprints down familiar black intersecting hallways. His saber casts a cold blue light against the stark contrast of the white light panels flying past him. 

A sharp tug from the force, not wholly unfamiliar, snaps him back to attention. Panic ices his veins and he shoots forward once again, ripping around corners faster than his mind can process. He pants, sweat rolling down the back of his neck as he pushes himself faster. He turns and sprints for what feels like hours. He has to get there. He has to get to someone. He doesn’t know where or who but he knows he’s going to be too late. He banks a corner too hard, slamming into the wall and pushing off of it without losing his stride.

A door slides open ahead and his feet sink into the solid polished floor, slowing him to a walk, even as his heart races faster. A long catwalk extends across a cavernous room. Ben’s seen this place so many times in his nightmares but it never ceases to shock him.

He approaches the man waiting for him. He’s turned away. Something snaps inside of Ben and he breaks out into a sprint again and suddenly he’s five years old and on Chandrila and his dad is bent over, arms open wide. When they meet, Han lifts his son in the air and spins him above his head. They laugh together and then they’re hugging and then Ben is tall again and he’s wearing all black and they’re back on Starkiller base and when they pull apart Han holds his son’s face.

“Come home. We miss you.”

Ben cries like he’d wanted to. He hugs his father again, tighter this time like he’d wanted to. He says, “I miss you too, Dad.” Like he’d wanted to.

 

His eyes flutter open and he feels peaceful. It’s the same kind of calm that follows hours of vomiting. The pain is gone and now the world feels softer.

The room is still dark with night. He’s unsurprised at the tears drying on his cheeks but when he squeezes Rey tighter to his chest he finds that he’s damp there too. Then he registers the press of her fist against her pec and she jerks in his hold. He lifts his chin and pulls back, untucking her head from under his neck so he can see her face. Her eyes are closed and the pain is so evident he feels it within himself in a way that has nothing to do with their force bond.

Ben reaches out to her, stroking her hair and cradling her hand in his. He softly calls her name. Somehow his efforts work and she calms. He trails his large deft fingers over her cool arm and scoots closer to her. His hand glides over her side to fit perfectly into the dip of her waist and he pulls her body into his own.

He presses his forehead to hers, smiling at her warmth. He shuts his eyes and drifts back to that meadow where Rey is waiting for him, a circlet of live flowers in hand.


End file.
